Maria is an artist and activist in the disability community. She acquired polio at a young age and has been a wheelchair user for most of her life. Read Maria’s poem titled The Older Sister to get a perspective on how disability can affect sibling relationships - as Maria’s words to her sister are raw and honest.
The Older Sister
Growing up you felt
like you had to protect me
even though you were
three years younger,
and I had words
much bigger than yours.
You were the dream child…
the pretty one,
but I was the one with the brains,
-brains that were expected to compensate
for the legs that betrayed me.
The crazy things is that
as pretty as you were
and as able-bodied as you were,
you were the one who felt crippled.
I had grown wings of my own…
wings made of words
that let me escape
while you were caged
by feelings of exclusion
and the illusion
that I was more loved than you.
Looking back,
I can see why
you felt so abandoned and left out.
Everyone focused on healing me
and curing me
while your own wounds
bled silently
and you felt that nobody cared.
and even then,
when it could have been so easy
to despise me
and to envy me,
you poured love over my differences,
defended me from bullies,
hauled my wheelchair up a flight of stairs
as if you were superwoman
and otherwise acted like you were in charge,
and you were….and I
envied that
about you,
and resented you for being
my “protector”
because I felt you dismissed
my older sister status…and my big words.
But I guess,
all sisters tend to be like that,
wrestling with power struggles
and hats they compete to wear
and you
always wanted to wear
the bigger hat
the one that put you in charge
even if that meant being in charge
of a life besides yours.
I’ve had to teach you to step back
because although I may be your crippled sister,
I will always be
your older sister
and no matter
how able-bodied you may be,
you do not have the right to live my life…
not even
in the name
of love.
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Thank you to Maria Palacios for sharing her poetry with AbleThrive. Maria is a poet, author, spoken word performer, public speaker, professional presenter and workshop facilitator, polio survivor and disability rights activist, and a mother of two. Her work is spirited by her own woman experience and embraces and promotes self-acceptance, empowerment, and social justice surrounding people with disabilities, gender and sexuality, teen girls and women, and a wide spectrum of issues as they relate to diversity. Her hopeful message of pride is consistent throughout her raw and often sensual work. Known in the artistic world as The Goddess on Wheels, her multicultural background and passion for onstage performance have come to life through numerous events over the years.